Kids Say the Darndest Things, Final Part (or until another kid says something ridiculous)

Two stories from school: (Names have been changed to protect the innocent)

#1:
Flute Student: "Do you want to know what Pete said about you?"

Me: "Sure."

Flute Student: "He said that you look like you're about to pop at any moment!"

Me: "Well, yes, I do look like that, don't I?"

Flute Student: "Yeah, I guess so."


#2:
One of our special ed teachers was telling me about a student that I have who was having a particularly rough day. He was having a meltdown during lunch because he did not get an extra garlic breadstick, and so he was standing on the yellow "X" in her room (his time-out area). She left the room, leaving him, a para, and the occupational therapist in the room. She came back a few minutes later, hoping to find him calmed down, but instead he found him even more agitated and the two teachers laughing hysterically. When she asked what was so funny, they said that his meltdown went from a garlic breadstick to realizing that I was having a baby, and so he was sobbing, "I didn't get a garlic breadstick, and Mrs. Tina is pregnant!" Apparently he had just come to this realization, and thought this was the worst thing in the world. The special ed teacher told him, "Mrs. Tina is not crying about it, so neither are you!"